What on earth does trill mean?

My girlfriend asked me what trill is after having seen it on some t-shirts. She’s quite insistent that it’s a verb, but I’m also too old and out-of-touch to know what it means.

Luckily, as a researcher and writer, I’m able to publish my investigations here. 

I asked my father: “It’s when you trill on a trumpet when you have a note like paarpaarpaarp, like that. It’s either that or the stuff you put on bird cages to mop up the poo” My friend Ronnie seems to agree, saying it’s ‘a vibration sound, like if you hit a tuning fork’.

My other friend Glenn thinks otherwise, suggesting it’s an Irish moment of excitement.

Another friend (I have upwards of five friends) says it’s an Irish band.

Wikipedia lists a number of music-related trills, though without bothering to look much closer, it all looks a bit too much like urban pop music to me.

Sticking to the urbanites, Urban Dictionary provides an alternative urban answer:

“An adjective used in hip-hop culture to describe someone who is considered to be well respected, coming from a combination of the words “true” and “real”. Should be ‘treal’ then, shouldn’t it?

I also managed to find this oddly-specific sex act described as trill: “to give blowjob to a guy while driving, when there are three girls in the back seat watching on at these events.

Maybe my girlfriend was trying to get me to do the deed with her (never!), because apparently trill can also mean getting kinky with the sky. “Having, or experiencing the euphoric feeling of, sex with the sky/universe. Feeling totally connected to everything; basically awesomeness captured and bottled with all things cool and then released into your bloodstream.”

Google images sends me in another direction. It appears to be a particularly unimaginative species in the Star trek universe. I mean, it’s just a human with a few pimples and a henna tattoo. Make an effort guys.

Snore time. Trill also stands for TRILL (Transparent Interconnection of Lots of Links), which is some head-explodingly boring computing thing that we don’t need to worry ourselves over.

My final line of inquiry led me to discover that Trill is the main character in a game called Captive, who is judged guilty and ordered in a space cryogenic prison for 250 years. Can’t imagine these youths were referring to that though, doesn’t quite seem cool enough, even though it’s cryogenic.

So, what on earth does it mean? Well ladies and gents, girlfriends and strangers, I have the answer, courtesy of a heavily-downvoted user back on Urban Dictionary. Take it away, Matthew Siler!

“One who shits in trash cans one who pantie raids locker rooms one who gets fucked by keough one who jacks off over kid anime porn in front of his father and one who smells like big foots dick!”

Of course.