Review: Gregg’s vegetable pasty

“Sing song merrily on Greggs” and “have fun, and the very best of Greggs luck” are two perfectly phrased, branded sentences that can be found on What cannot be found however is the Greggs vegetable pasty. I’ve searched rigorously through the virtual flakes of fat and sifted through the digital carbs on their website, yet cannot find any trace of it. I can only conclude that they are ashamed of their own vegetable pasty, which is a stance not without merit.

Despite their corporate shame, at 99p, this uniformly square parcel of vegetables is a bargain for any carbohydrate lover. It’s a starchy dream, though I cannot fully describe what the contents of the pasty are, as there is no available information anywhere. Alas, I believe it was a combination of potato, carrot and something green.

Apart from the potato, the rest is basically irrelevant anyway, as the texture is like mashed potato, the colour is potato coloured and it tastes, believe it or not, like potato. The carrots fail to provide any sort of crunch and the green appears to be included for little more than to break up the visual monotony of yellow hues. Luckily, I like potato and salt, so I found the pasty to be fairly nice for the low pricetag.

Pasties in general are beautifully diverse, and gourmet hot pasties are as equally nice on the ol’ tastebuds as a supermarket cold pasty is. The problem with the temperature of the Greggs vegetable pasty is that it is a little above room temperature. This unsettles the characteristics of the pastry, and ends up coming across as a hot pasty that has been left out too long, which of course it is. The dichotomy of pasties dictates that they are only tasty either hot or cold, yet the Greggs vegetable pasty occupies the uneasy limbo between the two ideals.

Verdict: at 99p for 550cals and 30g of fat, lovers of warm, salty potato will struggle to resist